Your Life or Your Money: a personal experience…

Okay, I’m no Ibo boy but mehn, who parts with his money?

This week has  not been so interesting, I must admit.. despite the three days “holiday”, thanks to the Association of Resident Doctors. And my phone would solely take the blame for all the series of not so fortunate event that has heralded my week so far… not to bore you too much, I’m sure you’re already trying to  see the link between the title and the content… Oya calm down, I have little gist for you…

As I prepared to pen these thoughts, or should I say experience, the first thing that came  to mind was the story of how Saga lost his phone… I must admit, I never read the whole thing then tho… buh you know as a sharp guy, i got the gist at just one glance… So Saga warned us in that his post to avoid talking to strangers (sorry I no get time to put up the link jare)… buh na stranger wey allow you waka commot that one go work for now! so my experience was a case of daylight robbery simple… Oya don’t get scared for me yet, no be gun-point things…

So simple question: have you ever had to choose between your life and your money? Wel, I chose my money… oya just calm down first.

On that fateful day as I enter computer village, na hin one bros accost me O… Na joke I call am, in fact I even wan waka comot, as a big boy… buh bros no gree me O! Before we know wetin dey happun, Mr Oga bring out all kind of things he claimed to be jazz… at that point, I knew this must be a joker… buh one can never be too careful tho… the scary thing however was the confidence with which he accosted me, right in the middle of the road, and boldly declared that no one would come to my rescue despite the fact that a Police post was less than 100 meters away… and true to his word, every one wey dey pass just free us dey waka deir own go O! At that point, I was beginning to feel some fear brim within me, buh even with that, I was dead sure in mind I ain’t losing a single Kobo to this joker… so my alertness was raised to the power of infinity asap… don’t trust these guys, they can rob you of your kidney without anesthesia… I swear… So there I was with this Mr Oga o, for over thirty minutes… negotiating a truce.. lol… the dude was adamant on collecting money from me right in the middle of the road… I even scoped him that we should move to one corner and settle amicably, na him my guy say he go hit me with jazz O… in my very innocent sarcastic nature, I smiled… guy obviously did not find it funny… he demanded for my phone, and trust me I showed him and told him why he cannot collect the phone and pocketed my phone back.. surprised? don’t be… later he said okay I should settle him otherwise I will los everything… I gave it a thought a while.. should I just give this guy 5H and go on with my life… so I asked him, how much do you want? na him the guy demand to see my wallet O… well, since I carry a rickety wallet I gladly brought it out… showed him the money I had in and told him I can’t afford to give him anything… Now you must be thinking I’m gangster abi? I think so myself… hahaha… all these while I was busy looking around if any of my guys in CV will show face or something… but aswear, a day of trouble is not a day to be on your own O… long story short, I managed to catch the eye of one of the guys on the street who signaled to me not to give in to Mr Oga’s threats and ayaj… with that reassuring gesture, pseudo confidence brewed in me… and before Mr Oga knew what was happening, I changed it for him… haha.. I like how that sounds… I sharply ayaj Mr Oga and warned him to not disturb next time he sees me in CV… and at that moment, I walked away… with my money and phone intact I must say…

Now don’t think my beautiful story ended with me bouncing off as champion!

A good blow to my face was enough to keep me in fear the next time I visit CV… haha, my guy was angry I suddenly developed confidence and he registered his anger with a well cooked and appropriately delivered blow to the posterior auricular region of my face… Oyinbo kpo… I swear na me farm… I should have preempted the reprisal but I was so bent on running away as soon as possible… as that blow land my face ehn, all I could think of was to turn the other cheek O… as a Christian, you know… lolz… buh seriously, I did not see any star… funny enough, the previously unconcerned CV crowd did not stay away this time, and as such, I was sure there won’t be a follow up uppercut… lol… so as the crowd gathered to see what’s up, I just like a Christian brother forgave Mr Oga and took my leave… 

And I walked tall on the streets of CV feeling proud of having kept my money and my phone, buh of course with the throbbing sensation radiating all around my head…

All in all, it was a good experience… So I ask you again: your money, or your life??? You choose!!!

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THE GIFT…

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It’s just a few days away and I suppose many of you are in some kinda dilemma already… Yeah I know how it feels… Quite confused you don’t know what I’ll like or won’t like; and as such you been finding it difficult to decide what to buy me and all sorts… Not to worry, in my vintage magnanimity, I’ve decided to come to your rescue… So I’m compiling gestures and items that make my ‘appreciated’ list of gifts… So endear yourself to pay apt attention.

Here we go:::

1. A BIBLE

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Okay, I’m not trying to form
holy-holy here, but the truth is I’ve not had a bible in over a year or so… Before you crucify me, I meant a presentable hard copy bible… Of course I have bibles on my phone. But I think now is a good time to get a hard copy… And for my preferred translation, guess I’ll still go for The Living Bible…
So as you plan your next visit to Bible Wonderland, add my copy to your list…

2. A brand new phone.
Definitely not a BB as many of you would know… But then, the new Samsung S IV is not looking bad at all, and I’m definitely tripping…

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20130607-163509.jpgAnd I tell you, it’s just about 100k so u can place your order ASAP… And just in case you’re bothered, I’ve not forsaken my first love yet… Not too soon… As you’re about to find out…

3. iPad mini

20130607-164406.jpgIsn’t it just handy?!? I mean… Since I’m switching my phone allegiance to Samsung, an iPad is definitely a necessity… And I forgot to add, it has to be a 64Gig iPad O… was actually thinking of the 128Gig iPad 4 but for many reasons I’ll manage the mini… last I checked, it’s still around 90k… Chicken change, right? I thought as much!
And as I was typing this, someone informed me that iPad mini 2 is coming out soon… Don’t bother yourself with that, I will manage the one in market already 😊

4. A bottle of Chanel fragrance…

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No much story here… The one I have is finishing very soon so a replacement is totally in order…
Just make sure it’s original… The last I used was from South Africa, so I don’t mind if you can get yours from France… That’s all

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5. A MacBook Pro of course…
Haba, I’m not gonna use this my laptop forever na… Abeg the thing don see better days already… Plus the retina display on the new MacBook ehn…

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You sef see for yourself

6. It’s quite a long list actually… Would loved to add this Canon HD camera

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Lest I forget…

7. A Monarki branded T-shirt (from Ghana)

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And you really don’t have to be in Ghana to make your order O, just find the catalogue on Facebook and get me one with a good message… I guess you’ve seen my ‘Christ loves the hell out of you’ shirt… Yea, that’s Monarki for you… So make it happen!!!

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Like I said, it’s a long list… But just keep your gifts within the ones I’ve managed to outline… Except you’re planning to get me a car anyways…

And on a final note, it will be good you immediately indicate which one you’re getting ASAP so someone else doesn’t get same… You know, I really can’t be carrying two iPads around for instance… You know what I mean… I’m not that proud, you know! At least not yet…

So till we see on the D day… Keep the gifts rolling in…

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Oops! My bad! I did not even remember to mention the birthday date sef… Guess you know that already!!! 😉

The Dean